Nancy's Notes

So yesterday as I watched a live stream video of a board meeting from EPSB I observed their 3 minute at a time rule for speaking.

Oh sure you get another 3 minutes on the next round but that there can be a lot of time between those ‘3 minutes.’  For me anyway.  So I know I bring some great things to a meeting.  However…..I know I can be impatient waiting for time to speak.  I think I’m worried we’re not going to get everything said.  So….I am making a commitment (to myself) to work on this.  To create a new habit.  My new habit will be…….I will only speak 3 minutes at a time.  I might have to practice this.  Actually I might have to practice a lot.  I’m getting kind of old to change a bad habit in a day.   Creating a new behavior isn’t always easy. You often start out all enthusiastic and excited (that’s where I’m at as I write this.)  But since you usually have to keep doing it every day for about 30 days or once a week for a whole lot of weeks to make the new habit into something that sticks and feels natural it becomes harder after a while.

 Life may interfere. Perhaps I’ll get overwhelmed at work or at home. Or maybe I’ll get impatient (actually count on that).  Maybe I’ll go away for a vacation or a conference somewhere and it will all go out the window.   Or maybe – because change is scary and could be harmful – my mind will start to create thoughts that try to persuade me to quit this new and possibly positive change.

What to do then? Here are a few tips that might help me to keep going on such tough days or to make smart decisions.

Just for today!

Sounds like I’m at a recovery group-well maybe I am.  It’s just that right now I’m the only member and my chant will be;  “Just for today when I am in a meeting; be it formal or informal. I will only speak for 3 minutes at a time and I will wait my turn till I get my next 3 minutes.”  

This is bad!! My thoughts are already thinking that if I was to get five 3 minute turns that would be 15 minutes.  I could get get a lot said in 15 minutes.  OMG I must be really far gone.  Okay, okay bring it back in Nancy.

By telling myself that I only have to do it today I will release the mental burden of the past times I did it and future times when I will do it. And so the task becomes much lighter and the inner resistance melts away.

Plus, it also reminds me that the period that I am investing in changing a habit is not the rest of my life. After 30 days or so the habit will mostly be automatic so it is not something I have to do on willpower for the next few years or decades.  I sure hope so.

So today is almost over and guess what, when tomorrow comes I’ll have a good day with less resistance and I will most likely feel like doing the task again.  Then again tomorrow should be easy because I have no meetings or anything where I have to practice this behavior.  I can still count that as a day in my 30 days can’t I?

Find inspiration quickly to change your mood and mind.

When I’m having a rough day then I’ll go and find some inspiration and motivation to keep going. With the help of just 15-20 minutes of personal development CDs, mp3s, blog posts or a chapter or two in a book they say one can often change negative thoughts and feelings within into something more positive.  So what will I use for this?  Not a lot of books on this habit that I’m familiar with.  Oh I know…I’ll watch reruns of that board meeting.  That should be stimulating or so boring that like a dog wearing a zap collar I’ll learn.

And so I’ll once again feel more motivated to keep going.

Nudge myself back on track when I slip.

I’ll probably slip along the way. It’s natural to do so. If I can avoid doing so over the 30 days then that is good. If I slip then that will have to be okay too. I won’t beat myself up if I do. That will only cause more negativity within and I may feel like giving up altogether just because I made a small slip or mistake; like speaking for 3-1/2 minutes for example.

Instead, I’ll nudge yourself back on track the next day again. And then keep going with the thought in mind that it is the smart choice to forgive myself and make it easier to make this habit a sticky habit.

Take a break/have a cheat day

Maybe I simply need a break for a day or two. Then darn it I will just take it. I think I should take my break on board meeting day or Committee of the Whole day….. But then nudge myself back on track again.  No?  Okay I won’t make it intentional and I will not let a small break become the end of this positive change.

Quit.

Am I trying to rid myself of this habit because I truly want it? Or am I creating it because someone told me to or because some people around me seem to have the ability to do this naturally?  Well all of these I think.

I think that often when someone works on a new behavior there will be thoughts and feelings of not wanting to work on it.  Much easier to revert to the old habit. Or in this case difficult because I just so want to do the right thing for my community.  I desperately feel that if people can hear how passionate I am about a topic or initiative and how much work I’ve done to support that then I will have done the right thing.

 The only difference is that now I have to get all that done,  done well and in only 3 minutes…….

 “Sometimes, in a moral struggle, we discover the right thing to do – just as, on some cold day long ago, we discovered mittens pinned to our coat sleeve. ” Robert Brault

So today my parent role vs trustee role has been tested.  I am aware of the cautious note we always hear about stepping back as a parent because now we are ‘trustees’.  When a parent tells me today that her child has told her a staff member is ‘picking on’ my child I am uncertain how to deal with it.  What breaks my heart is that my 12 year old has indicated this for the last 2 months.  I discounted what he said and told him he must be ‘misunderstanding’ the staff member’s intentions.  When I decided to take him aside and talk today I knew the right thing to do.  My boy needed me.  Had I lost sight of this as I talked ‘Transformation of Education’ and ‘Inspiring Education’?  Well when I saw my boy in tears today I knew what my primary job is.  I am definately passionate about advocating for the best public education for all equally and remembering that I represent my ‘board’ in all my dealings.  That will not change.  But I will be more cautious to not lose sight of the fact that two of those students I am talking about are my own children and I have to advocate for them too.  However, they don’t call me an advocate when I stand up for them.  They call me their Mom.

    A few days ago at a  PSBAA council meeting, Wayne Hulley challenged us to consider:

“Who would ever apply for a job where for thirteen years you sit in a chair, can’t leave your seat unless you get permission, can’t even go to the bathroom unless you ask. Why are we doing this to our kids?”       Not anymore!!!!

We need new lenses in education.  A different way of viewing what it means to learn and teach.  Many of us are used to seeing the entire educational process from the proverbial “car window”–travelling from one point to another with only passing interest in how we get there and what lies in between. Things are done the way they have always been done.  It is easier that way, and until recently, that was all that was expected.Educational leaders (meaning dedicated teachers, administrators and school advocates and trustees) are beginning to put away the rose-colored glasses in favor of new lenses.

Lenses that:

• allow the viewing of more possibilities and fewer obstacles
• show a radically transformed educational system that values student input and individualizes instruction to meet student needs
• diminish the fear of technology and help educators embrace it as a powerful tool for teachers and students
• see the “back to basics” movement for what it is–a step backward, when we need to be moving forward
• cause us to reflect on all current educational practices, with a mind to change, or eliminate, those that are not in the best interest of our students

As people in the world of education, we have been wearing the same glasses for too long.  It is time for an eye exam and a new prescription. Let’s change the way we look at teaching and schools.

As I watch the 1 year anniversary of the Olympics I am reminded of the impact it has on us a country.   I am uncertain of the longevity of that impact but it did prove that ‘together’ we can stand out front on the world stage in anything we do.  “I Believe” as a slogan means a lot because for so long we didn’t believe in ourselves or our country.  It is difficult for me as a person from eastern Canada constantly hearing the conversation about how the east takes from the west.  I never knew this in my life and after living the better part of  30 years in Alberta I believe I can look from both sides.  I know that what I have received from this province I have tried to give back.  Please don’t generalize about my work ethic, my upbringing, my capabilities, my education, my values and my moral fibre and I promise not to do that to you.  “I Believe” that unified we are a great country; from sea to shining sea.

Some days I’m not sure why I ever ventured into this trustee world.  It is thankless, time consuming and my background isn’t education and then I remind myself we are all teacher’s and can all make a difference. And I was taught many of my life lesson’s by a very wise man. This was a note I received from one of Dad’s foreign students almost 3 years ago just after my Dad passed away.

   I came to Canada from Nigeria in 1982 to learn how to fly. Even before I got here I felt like I knew Mr. McClure as he tried to make my voyage to Canada as trouble-free as possible.

When I arrived at the Moncton Train Station on August 2nd 1982, Don sent his Cool Station Wagon to pick me up. He made the MFC become like… a revolving family setting and as I needed to take different courses, I did not think twice about where to return for those courses.

When I returned in 1988/89 and got my Flight Instructor rating, Don helped me get my First and second jobs. His recommendation also made securing a Work Visa easy. I ended up marrying from Buctouche making the Moncton area part home.

In 2008, I found Don’s email address on the Internet and sent him a thank you letter which was unfortunately returned due to a bad email address. When I learnt of his passing, it was a sense of tremendous loss that I did not get to thank him for all he did in my life.

Mr. McClure, I know you can still read this and I want to say THANK YOU for being such a wonderful person. You practised equality and globalisation with sterling vision before it became fashionable. To many of us, you were like a father. I still remember a talk you gave to me in 1985 about AIDS and why us young men should practise a one man one woman relationship. Other students laughed at the time but it made me into a better man.

From the provinces of Canada, Libya, Nigeria, UK, the Carribeans, Nepal, India, Pakistan and all other places that sent men and women to you to turn into Pilots, I think I speak for all of them when I say the world lost a Great Man.

Rest in Peace Don, but I know that if they have airplanes in Heaven, you will be helping run an efficient operation and checking up on the airplanes and asking why they are not up flying just as you did to keep us on our toes; but most of all, thank you for changing the life of an 18 year old from an African village. 

It’s really exciting to see our team working together to get things down.   Collaboration?  You Bet!!!!